Update

vendor/tailscale.com/net/sockopts/sockopts_linux.go

@@ -0,0 +1,40 @@
+// Copyright (c) Tailscale Inc & AUTHORS
+// SPDX-License-Identifier: BSD-3-Clause
+
+//go:build linux
+
+package sockopts
+
+import (
+	"net"
+	"syscall"
+
+	"tailscale.com/types/nettype"
+)
+
+// SetBufferSize sets pconn's buffer to size for direction. It attempts
+// (errForce) to set SO_SNDBUFFORCE or SO_RECVBUFFORCE which can overcome the
+// limit of net.core.{r,w}mem_max, but require CAP_NET_ADMIN. It falls back to
+// the portable implementation (errPortable) if that fails, which may be
+// silently capped to net.core.{r,w}mem_max.
+//
+// If pconn is not a [*net.UDPConn], then SetBufferSize is no-op.
+func SetBufferSize(pconn nettype.PacketConn, direction BufferDirection, size int) (errForce error, errPortable error) {
+	opt := syscall.SO_RCVBUFFORCE
+	if direction == WriteDirection {
+		opt = syscall.SO_SNDBUFFORCE
+	}
+	if c, ok := pconn.(*net.UDPConn); ok {
+		var rc syscall.RawConn
+		rc, errForce = c.SyscallConn()
+		if errForce == nil {
+			rc.Control(func(fd uintptr) {
+				errForce = syscall.SetsockoptInt(int(fd), syscall.SOL_SOCKET, opt, size)
+			})
+		}
+		if errForce != nil {
+			errPortable = portableSetBufferSize(pconn, direction, size)
+		}
+	}
+	return errForce, errPortable
+}